5/5 Stars
‘How to Overcome the Bully In Your Brain and Achieve the Life You Want and Deserve’ by James L. Holmes is a self help book designed to help you manage and harness the critical voice in your head that actively inflames depression, anxiety, addictions, low confidence, and low self-esteem.
I loved this book! The book does not read as a lecture, its potentially serious tone is broken up with light-hearted, chatty comments that make the reader feel as if they are having a conversation with the author, making it easier to connect.
The book aims to challenge limiting beliefs and build self-esteem using the four stages of competence, a psychological term used to document the process of learning a skill. The author also acknowledges that not one size fits all and offers alternatives for various methods as he goes. From my understanding, though I am no psychologist, fitting everybody into one ‘way-of-thinking’ is one of the main weaknesses in certain psychology matters, letting this ‘alternative method’ lead to a wonderful sense of empathy.
It is rather off topic, but I also really liked the rather unique suggestion where the author invites the reader to reach out with suggestions, right after what he writes about ‘we are always learning’. I feel like that emphasised the message he was literally just explaining.
The first chapter serves as a summary of the rest of the book, but begins to break into the philosophical and much needed questions that are posed to encourage the reader to observe their own psychology from a rational and objective point of view.
Psychology terms are explained in an easy way, without patronising the reader, and the writing was gripping in that I was absolutely fascinated with the discussion of psychological studies. The advice given was very understandable and is coupled with real-life examples in such a way that lends credence to what the author is saying. I myself found myself making notes about the 100% rule. It was a concept that makes sense, and explains why a lot of my own self-imposed habits have failed.
The wealth of experience and insight James L. Holmes shares with us is incredibly informative and teaches us facts that prove to be memorable, and I dare say I will be quoting the book next time I am in a discussion about mental health.
I would recommend this book even if you aren’t looking for any specific self-help. If you are in any way fascinated with psychology, I would recommend picking this up.
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